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“Hello sweet thang,” Jack says to welcome the lovely lady. “What can I get you?”“Hello,” the lady replied. “Can you two of your favorite drink?”“Coming right up,” Jack replies starting on the drinks, making 2 irish car bombs. As Jack finishes the drinks he warns, “Hope you can get a ride home cause I like my drinks strong.”“Oh, I think I will,” the lady said with a wink. As Jack turned his back to grab a replacement bottle of Jack, she starts her plan. She grabs one of the drinks to tamper with. As she hold her wrist over the drink, she looks around to make sure no one is looking her way. With her nail, she cuts her wrist right on the vein, very slightly. As a few drops into the drink, the lady retracts her arm and covers her wrist, seemingly healing her wound.As Jack returns he asks the lady, “ I hope you don’t mind, but may I ask for your name?”“My name is Amanda, what’s yours?” replied Amanda.“Jack,” answered Jack. With that information in hand, Jack decides to play his hand and. " I said."Hey slow down," Sgt Fforbes said."Good idea," said the white haired old lady sitting across from us, "Chop it off if that doesn't work." Wind their cocks up," I said."Look Johnno, you better think this through," Tony said, "You might have an idea there." he said, "Like a key with a slot, pull the cock through and wind it round, like the key on a spam can."Bloody hell he was nicking my idea and improving it."Shit," I said, "That's it!" What are you on about?" Fforbes asked so we shut up and had an argument about Football instead."So Mr Allthorpe?" the TV interviewer’s researcher asked, as we ran through the questions before filming “Do you get a sexual thrill from torturing pedophiles?"She wasn’t a bad looker really, more Rodean than Rotherham, London complexion, Dulux rose pink over sandpaper, saggy tits from too much dieting not enough action but I could have give her one no danger.Trouble was I couldn't believe she just said that to me. Me John Althwaite, the BNP local.
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